Subdued Intrinsic

Last night I dreamt:

1. That I had somehow become a shape-shifter, but in my dream shifters were all kept together in an almost militant setting, in a secret base in the middle of and beneath a small lake.  Also, I was a boy for most of it. I'm pretty sure I can attribute this to watching Teen Wolf and seeing some tweets about Supernaturally online.

2. That I had an extremely vivid dream in which my mother and step-father were getting divorced. My real lie in-laws were my step family and my own children were step cousins. Not cool. I texted a friend about it in my dream-within-a-dream only to wake up and find my mother's long time, live-in boyfriend was David Tennant, and he wasn't going anywhere. He adored my mother and me, and my little brother. Try the strange weirdness that is completely crushing on your potential step-dad, even though he clearly loves having "relations" with your mom. Also, when I woke up (not really awake, just from the inner dream), my friend had texted me back with condolences. Sleep texting?

So, dear psyche, please stop doing this to me. I'm an adult woman with a fantastic (hot) husband, great sons, and I can frakking well delight in the quirky, lanky beauty that is David Tennant without your help, thanks.

Love,
Amethyst

Okay, so I realize I probably don't have the kind of readers with money to burn lying around, but I do have the kind of heart that wants to help her friends. If you have some change in your pocket, or one of those jars, you know, the big ones you keep coins in? Count out a little of it and set it aside for the following.



You see that? A community center to help teach writers! You may not be in Utah, but there are a ton of would-be writers who are, people like the bulk of my readers who are in varying stages of reaching for that dream, and this will be their open door.

What is passion, but fire? Art, but beauty?

P.S. And yes, I donated some money, too.

Personal Note: We're going to a family bonfire (er, I mean a bonfire hosted by family, not one where we roast our relatives) and there will be various foods cooking on sticks, old tool style. As you might guess, there will be S'mores. I'm not big on S'mores. For one thing, I'm kind of a DO NOT MIX THE FOODS variety of OCD, and secondly, the concept of a square millimeter of my skin getting *shivers* sticky for a nanosecond freaks me out like you would not believe. Adhesives are a personal Hell, folks. Anyway, as irony would have it, I was tapped to bring along the fixin's for the S'mores. I got all the regular stuff, and then, because I'm a wild and crazy guy (I need a Steve Martin here), I bought a large bar of Hershey's Cookies-n-Creme chocolate, to experiment with. I'll let you know how that turns out.

And now, for the main feature of this blog post. I know I've not been writing a lot of helpful blogs right now, but I'm claiming holiday chaos. I'm not doing a lot of revision or other writing, either, because I know myself; if I try and interruption after interruption were to dog me I would eventually try to kill someone. And I love all the people I live with. I did not give birth to three of them only to take their lives back in a homicidal rage X number of years later.

So, I've been posting rather egoscentric, fluff posts (you're probably getting another one tomorrow, just forewarning, because my betas, friends, and readers have their own opinions of who would make good Dionadir characters, and I am entirely pro-supporting-reader-insight). I do plan on writing more thoughtful posts by the start of next week, promise. But for today, as with yesterday, I give you this kind of awesome bit if 'Yay! For me!" news.

This morning my husband surprised me buy going to Dell.com and sitting me down to pick and choose the features I wanted for my Christmas present, a new Dell Netbook (Don't worry, Bales; I made absolutely sure it came with the newest edition of Microsoft Office, and Windows 7, so I'll still have SpellCheck, which we know is something I desperately depend on). N. even paid a little more so I could have the Product (Red) colored one. You guys know how I feel about supporting charities whenever financially possible, and since that shade of red is my favorite (hello, look at my hair!) it's a Double Bonus, right. Anyway, it'll look like this:



It won't come in for anywhere between one and two weeks, but it finally sort of sank in I'd have a computer all my own, just for my work. That's what N. said. It's a gift to show his faith in my writing and how much he supports my dreams. And now I think I'm gonna cry.

;)

Personal Note: Um, Happy Thanksgiving! May your families forget all the grudges for the day, and you have enough turkey to knock you all out, if they don't.

OHMYAPOSTROPHES!!!


The fabulous, probably-doesn't-think-highly-enough-of-herself Brianne Heavy has written a couple of tunes; the first, "Guardian", is inspired the first Dionadir novel, Silver, and the harder second is an untitled anthem for the trology's very own tortured bad boy, Ian.

GO. LISTEN. TO. THEM.

Personal Note: As you may imagine, I am a serious lover of words. I've got so many of them crammed into my head-even some in other languages-I have no room in there for numbers. Numbers make me cry, and words make my soul sit up and take notice. So, it's really, really odd to me with all this wordage in my system I totally, totally suck at Scrabble. I can kick butt at Balderdash and no one has EVER taken me in Scattergories, but put the most classic, most famous, possibly simplest-form word board game in front of me and I can't win to save my soul. No kidding.

Now, about that slogan business . . .

The other day while I shopped for a few things for my oldest's birthday party (Go eight, baby!) I came across a tee-shirt printed with the admonition, Inspire Those You Love, which I find to be a lovely sentiment.

However, I feel it's rather easy to inspire those you love. You love them and therefore you are naturally inclined to want to be the best person you can for them. Wanting to inspire those you love isn't something you think about. Don't mistake me, I got what the tee-shirt meant. Yes, yes, be the kind of person your loved ones aspire to be like, the kind of person they are bursting with pride for. Certainly a beautiful goal and one we should all hope to reach. I'm all for it. I practice it myself. I've got an amazing, sometimes-jerk-but-always-just-what-I-need husband, and three indescribably cool sons, all totally individual to inspire. My oldest little beauty, Gabriel, is old enough and adult-in-a-child's-body enough to understand what it means that Mom is a 'writer', how it's important. He knows how much I like to read, and while he's a math person and reading comes slowly to him he still pushes on with it because he wants to make me proud and to be like me. Dear heaven, you don't know how much that swallows my heart whole.

So, understand I'm not downplaying inspiring those YOU love.

But I think it's just as important, neck and neck, with loving those you inspire.

I am more honored than I can ever describe to have people who test read for me, read my blog and get something helpful from it, to have young women (and yes, even a couple of young men), peers, others in this 'writer wannabe' boat, feel encouraged and take hope from my thoughts and scribblings. When my own faith falls short it's their hope for me that brings me back. I can't give up because what a horrible misuse of their belief in me would that be? Somehow, in ways too mind-blowing and obscure to understand I, stupid, boring, scared me, inspired them so how could I justify letting that inexplicable blessing fade away?

Nope. Can't. Because, you see, something in the transfer of hopes between us has done more than bond us as advisor and students. It has given me the most genuine of love for them. Like the love I have for my own children, who were born of my body, I have love for them, born of my passions.

Sometimes I forget why I wish on stars. They remind me.